A Dog named Breezie....

Luke and I finally decided to try out an inside dog for our family.  We were FINALLY approved for the ARFA organization for rescues.  My gosh, I've never been turned down from so many places trying to adopt a dog before.  Not to toot my own horn- but to turn us down from rescuing a dog?!!  Seriously?!!! 

So, a lady is bringing Breezie out to meet our family on Saturday.  I actually allowed myself to get excited about it yesterday.  I went to Target and bought her a bed.  I've been looking at collars and crates to see what would work best.  She's a Yorkie/Dauschand Mix.  I've never had either of these breeds before.  I really wanted a Cocker Spaniel, however, it seemed like the Lord didn't want me to have one right now! 

I'm not sure how she's going to do with the kids.  It will be a trial run for sure.  Luke expects her to stay- so I'm allowing myself to think that way too.  I've missed my Madison for 4 months now.  I still cry when I think about her and miss the companionship so much!  All of our outside dogs are "special needs" and older.  I think having a young one for the kids to grow up with will be awesome.  She only weighs 8.5 lbs.  I've NEVER had a dog this small- we are big dog people.  It's amazing how small everything is for her!  I'm hoping she'll be a great travel dog as well!

Here's to hoping she's Breezie Williams soon.  She's got to have a middle name though- all of ours do!

Funny Sayings from Kids...

The kids have been saying things off and on that just crack me up.  I wanted to write them down so I could remember them.  Also, we've had some really sweet things said to us that I'd like to remember too.

1.  Our little boy looked horrified at Cracker Barrel when I ordered catfish.  When it came to the table, he asked me, "Mom, are you eating Cat or Fish?" When I told him it was both, he said, "Oh you're eating George and Aly?!!!"  We tried to explain to him that Catfish were actually fish, but I'm not sure if he got it or not.

2.  Popeyes- otherwise known to our little boy as Poke-ies.  He asked if we were going to eat at Poke-ies.  Ummm....no.

3.  When I took our little girl to the foot dr. the other day.  We were looking at all the gross videos and pictures.  She looked on the wall where they had items for sale.  Her eyes got huge and she said, "Oh no Mom!  Someone's foot fell off.  I bet that hurt a lot!"  I was trying not to laugh when I noticed a foot model for Diabetic socks.  It was a plastic foot!

4. Our little boy has been saying, "Ummm, Ahhh" before every sentence and thought.  We told him the other day to stop saying that because it was really annoying.  He paused and said, "Ok, I'm just going to say Umm Ahh in my head. Ok?"  Yeah sure, whatever!

5.  After a really rough night with our little boy, he came in the next morning and said, "Mom, I wish I had lived here since a baby.  I wish you'd had me as a baby."  After I picked my heart up off the floor, I told him that I did too.  I wish all the bad stuff hadn't happened to him.  I told him that that would never happen here at our house. However, all the bad stuff that happened to him would one day make him a better person.

Court...

Luke and I drove over 3 hours to get to court yesterday with the kids.  We were set up with snacks, a timer, reward charts, and a portable dvd player.  It was a great day for behavior with the kids.  They did wonderful considering the circumstances of spending all day in the car.

When we got to court- we weren't surprised it was running late.  Well, we didn't know how late.  We waited over 3 hours- without being able to go get lunch.  I was so thankful I had packed many snacks in the car.  It was very hard going into that court room knowing that this is where it all began for our kids.  This is where they lost their parents, found a wonderful foster mom, and yesterday were able to set up their forever family date.

It was also extremely stressful for me and Luke.  Not only were we terrified of running into their bio family- we don't even know what they look like or who they are!  So, everytime someone would look at the kids, I was immediately on the defensive.  I felt like we were a deck of cards- only I didn't have any cards or even the upper hand!

We saw many people and situations yesterday that were hard to take in.  Our little boy immediately shut down as we walked into the court house.  He was back to his shy self and only nodding his head.  I was just trying to hold it all together.  They sat in our laps most of the day.  The sweetest thing I saw was our little boy laying his head on his Daddy's shoulders and just resting. 

When we finally were able to go into the court room, I was a nervous wreck.  My poor stomach was in knots, I had no idea what to expect.  Our little girl never let go of my hand the entire time.  The judge was SUPER nice and soft spoken.  They read over what the kids had been through as far as the court system went.  He told the kids that he was sure things had definitely changed for the better for them.  We set up our "gotcha" date.  The social worker wanted it set for 8:30 am.  she told the judge I loved Branson- and she wanted us to make a weekend out of it.  He just laughed, looked at Luke and said, "I think your wallet is going to get a little lighter."  And with that, it was over.

We walked back to the car hand in hand- as a family.  We immediately went to Sonic where the kids got Corn Dog Wacky Packs.  Luke and I had trouble eating as our stomach was still in knots.  My root beer and I had a moment in the parking lot.  I was finally able to breathe again.

We headed home and stopped only once to eat at a Chinese Buffet.  The kids were once again their new selves full of laughter and picking on one another.  I hope someday they realize how blessed they are- but in the reality of things, it's really Luke and I who are blessed!  

Being Real....

I was thinking back today on our whole adoption journey.  Nothing can prepare you for the ups and downs of this process.  It's like a roller coaster where your heart is heavily involved.  There's the waiting, thinking, praying, picking, training, and then you finally get to meet your kiddos!

It's hard to believe we've only had the kids a little over a month.  They just seem to fit with us.  I wouldn't trade the craziness, 9 thousand loaves of pb&j's, or 10 hundred loads of laundry for anything.  Being a stay at home Mom has been my dream job all along- and I'm living it.

I guess if I had any advice to share with someone about to go down the road of adoption, it would be to pray!  Find you a support group of other people going through the same thing.  Luke and I are so blessed to be part of a small group of foster and adoptive parents.  It's even with a  couple we went to high school with- which I think is extra special and cool.

Another piece of advice is: be yourself and stick to your guns about what's right and wrong for your kids.  Your family won't always understand why you are doing what you're doing.  They will question and offer advice, but you have to know what works for your kids and what doesn't.  In one month, Luke and I had our lives turned upside down- for the better.  We rarely can stay up past 8:30- or at least I can't anymore.  We watch TV now in the bedroom.  We eat every meal saying a small simple blessing with the kids.  Our lives were forever changed by these two precious ones.  I thank the Lord every day for bringing them into our lives.

I went to visit the cemetery yesterday.  Someplace I haven't been in a very long time.  I took flowers to my Grandma and PaPa.  It was my first time being there as a Mom.  They adopted some years ago, and I still wonder to this day what they would have to say about our journey.  Aunt Debbi and Uncle Will are right across the street from Grandma and PaPa.  We had a chat yesterday too.  I wonder what Aunt Debbi would think about having our little girl as her namesake.  What I wouldn't give to have these 4 people just hug our kids once.  How precious would that be!

So, if you know of anyone taking the road of adoption, offer them your prayers and encouragement.  They are in for the rides of their lives.  They do not need your advice or arguments.  They only need support-positive support.  You may not understand why you have yet to meet their kids, or why they no longer return phone calls the way they used to, you may not even understand or support their decisions in how they parent.  Just know they are trying to do their best- and the best that you can do for them is offer prayers or encouragement.

Our little boy has a new chore every morning- he has to clean out the litter box.  I, on one hand, love the fact that I don't anymore!  He stopped the other morning, looked at me and said, "So that's why Aly has a hole under her tail.  It's for the litter box!"  Ummm... yeah. Really!

Our little girl loves setting the table.  I have silver ware that Aunt Debbi bought us when we got married.  It has flowers on it.  Our little girl loves the pretty forks and always makes sure me and her get that one. 

I've learned to smile on the little things, let other things go, and love my children everyday.  It's not always easy, but it's so worth it to be doing what God called us to do!

A New Dog....Maybe.....

Unbeknown to Luke, I've been looking at rescue sites the past week or so for dogs.  Normally, I wouldn't look for dogs on a site- they usually come to me.  Our little Madison has been gone for 3 months now.  Even though our house is full of chaos from the kids, I really think I'm ready to love something else.  I miss the companionship that I had from Madison.  I know we have 4 dogs outside, and I love them all just the same.  However, it's just different.  The outside dogs are so "special needs" that bringing one of them inside would upset the whole apple cart- especially for our little Snoopy.

So, I've filled out two adoption applications through CARE- Central Arkansas Rescue Effort and Helping Hands for Little Paws.  One is a Cocker Spaniel- near and dear breed to my heart.  Another is a throw away mix named Helen.  I want what the Lord wants.  If one of these dogs is meant for us- then it will work out.  If not, He'll send someone our way that needs us.  He has a way of doing that with our family- whether it be kids or animals.  He's good like that!

1st Grade Program

Our little boy had his first school program last night.  Luke and I were surprised that he actually wanted to do this.  We thought he might have been so shy at first.  However, we were pleasantly surprised.  He was all grins- he basically glowed!  NaNa, PaPa, Summer, and Kingston came to cheer him on.  He basically looked at us the whole time.  Luke took a TON of pictures, and I can't wait to scrapbook it.  He even got to play the xylophone.  After the program, we went to Chili's to get dinner.

It's amazing how far the kids have come in less than a month.  Our little girl is giving Luke more hugs than we ever thought possible.  She says "I love you" all the time.  Our little boy has yet to say that, my ears yearn to hear those words from his mouth, but I know it will all happen in time.  Our little boy is coming up to me and giving random hugs- which is a HUGE deal!!!

We are starting to recite scripture on the way to school.  I thought we'd start first with John 3:16.  We talked about the meaning of the verse.  They wanted to know what the word parish meant.  That, in turn, led to a long conversation with our little girl.  She's afraid we're going to leave her like her bad family did.  Reassurance is all we have to offer- and I pray that it's enough.   On the other hand, our little boy said that "Jesus lives in outer space."  I asked him what gave him that impression.  He said, "Well, heaven is far far away- and its in outer space!"

He also calls the stopper in the bath tub- the "plugger."  That always makes me smile- I'm not even sure why!

These kids amaze me more everyday.  I'm praying for the Lord to wipe away the memories of their past and to help them feel safe and secure.  One day at a time!

1st Day of School....

We got our lunches packed- PB&J, chips, a twinkie, and a juice box, our backpacks all ready to go, and our clothes picked out.  Luke and I spent the afternoon yesterday getting our little boy's room all organized.  We went and bought tubs for him.  Then, we labeled them with pictures so he would know which toy went where.  We sure hope it helps him. 

We watched the movie Cars yesterday afternoon.  For supper, the kids picked tacos- even though we'd had them the night before.  I'm so glad they came to a family that loves to eat Mexican food as much as we do!  We settled into our bed to watch some TV.  Luke and I didn't have much "kid" TV recorded, so we decided to watch the Sandwich King from Food Network.  The kids actually liked it.  After that, it was time for bed.  We talked about school, made sure their rooms were safe, and turned the lights out. 

Our little boy immediately started "itching."  A new thing for him- I'm thinking it's an attention seeker.  So, I went and got a wet washcloth for him- with special "Medicine" on it.  He immediately stopped itching.  Later, when Luke went to check on him, he said, "Dad, that medicine is great!  I had a bump and it went down fast!"  LOL!!!  Luke told me he had to leave the room to keep from laughing.  Our little girl still struggles a bit at nighttime, but at least with reassurance, she's sleeping through the night.

This morning, we got up at 6.  They did their chore chart- which consists of getting dressed, brushing teeth, making our bed, and picking up toys.  For breakfast, they had a waffle with peanut butter, syrup, and bananas.  We couldn't resist taking a few pictures.  At school, we waited in the office to be escorted to meet their teachers.  They both seemed really nice.  Our little girl was quiet as we got to the classroom- a first for sure!!!  Our little boy resorted back to being shy.  It was SO hard to leave them at school.  I wanted to tell the teachers to be nice and compassionate, because they've been through a lot.  Luke and I prayed for them as we were leaving.

Can't wait to get them after school.  For now, I'm enjoying the quiet. I'm going to clean and exercise, and I might even knit!!!